we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
