I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
