now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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