WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Randomize
