so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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