today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Sorry about my life...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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