it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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