? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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