so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
