I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
