so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Randomize
