I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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