woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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