oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
