Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
