no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
