your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
