apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
