im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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