Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
