everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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