we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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