I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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