i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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