none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
