so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
