So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
