Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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