Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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