The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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