WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
