Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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