i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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