i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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