Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize