Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
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