put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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