we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Randomize
