so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize