my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
