Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
