If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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