You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
