Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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