Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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