Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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