ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
