Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
