sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize