What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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