just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
